Two cards, two teachers

I’ve been having a pretty rough stretch lately, particularly at that intersection between my professional and personal lives. Yesterday, I noticed that I hadn’t actually looked at my cards for more than a month, which is a pretty atypical stretch me, and probably a sign that I’m uncomfortable with something…

Tarot Allies galore

I recently returned from a much-anticipated and somewhat-feared solo retreat at Christ In The Wilderness, a retreat center located near Stockton, Illinois. It’s a really lovely space, and offers what is (for me, at least) something particularly precious: solitude. I spent four days and three nights there, alone with a…

A year of Justice? Sure, why not?

My birthday was a week ago, which means that it’s time to offer some ill-informed ramblings about my new year card. Last year, as I talked about here, was a Wheel of Fortune year for me, and I certainly experienced a good deal of that on-the-edge whirling throughout the past…

In defense of the edge

‘Wheel never stops turning, Badger.’ ‘That only matters to the people on the rim.'” -Malcolm Reynolds and Badger, Pilot episode of Firefly I’m about seven months into a Wheel year, which means that, from a numerological standpoint, the year that started on my last birthday has been (is being) ruled…

Freshly inked

So…this happened recently. It started, as such things sometimes do, with a dream. In fact, I think I briefly referenced the dream on the blog sometime last year…yes! I did, appropriately enough in this t-shirt post. The dream, which took place early in 2012, was simple enough – I had…

Happy fun grieving times

So, some folks have asked how I’m doing, and…well, I guess I got around to asking myself the same question tonight. Oops.   The hardest thing, I find, is that I am pretty much incapable of being around strong emotions. I feel like a toddler, at times – picking up…

Tarot Draw 13

Three weeks ago today, I was packing up for a trip to Missouri. It was the sort of flurry of activity that I tend to retreat into when I know that slowing down is going to force me to look closely at my feelings, and lord knows we can’t have…

Eulogy

The memorial mass for my dad was last Saturday, and I had an opportunity to speak briefly. I am not the sort to write out what I’m going to say ahead of time verbatim, so this isn’t a perfect reconstruction. It’s fairly close, though.   ————————– In my spiritual tradition,…

Requiescat in pace

My father died Monday morning at about 12:30am. He was surrounded by loved ones right until the end, and while I am heartbroken by his passing I am also exhaling in relief that he is no longer suffering. His last few years were hard ones physically, but always with the…

Just about time now

It’s 3am and I am in the car, 50 miles from my parents’ place. I am hoping to make it there in time to say my goodbyes while Dad is still alive, but I’m (mostly) okay with the possibility that that won’t happen. Not much else to say right now…

Talking about the weather

It was 3 days after I heard the prognosis before I talked to my dad. Mom and I had spoken on the phone a couple of times by then, and I had some good excuses all set up in my head for focusing on her instead. “I’m sure Dad is…

Well, crap.

So, my dad is dying of liver cancer.   There’s more to the story than that, of course. Even so, when the bottom line is that he’s dying, I’m finding that the rest of the story rather less compelling.   Since receiving this news a few days ago, I’ve found…

Pondering right action

On Saturday, Elizabeth and I went out to our favorite Thai place up on Western Avenue. The food was, as usual, quite good, and I tried an appetizer that was new to me – beef satay. I’d had chicken satay before, but it turns out that the combination of fat…